annaangel (preciousann) wrote,

  • Mood:

just need to talk

ok so i started getting dizzy and i guess passed out on my mom for a while. when i finally got up i got in this shitty mood. i dont want to be touched i just want to be left alone. i wont even try to sit next to my boyfriend cause no matter how many times i tell him i dont feel like being touched he just keeps trying to rub my back or something. i know he is just tryinig to be with me and be affectionate or whatever you want to call it but i just cant handle it at times.
today was just crazy my mom and her fiance were arguing and i thought we were gonna have to find another place to live. so far everything is ok. i just hope it stays that way. i know that no one wants to move again. we just got done moving into this trailer. i love this trailer and i know my mom does too.
My mom asked me what about gus when i told her that my cousin said me and her could come stay with her. maybe it was mean but i said i dont know as long as my mom and i have a plave to go. i know he could always go back to his mothers house. or his brothers or whatever. i am not trying to be mean to him. i just put my mom before anyone. even before myself.
I do have to say that before the argument started me and my mom had a lot of fun listening to music and talking. we sang together and had fun. we always have fun when its just me and her. we have fun with lawrence too but atleast i know when its just me and my mom then nobody will get grouchy.
i have been really depressed on and off. i am really trying to hide it but i dont think its working to well. im sure my mom know that i have been depressed. i cant hide it from her. she knows to well about depression. and other things. she always knows when something is wrong. i guess thats because she has been the only one who has payed attention to me. i am so glad she knows when something is wrong cause she always gets me to talk. or atleast most of the time she gets me to talk. its really good for me. i used to hold everything in.
anyways i am going to watch a movie with my mom and everyone

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