totally flipped out. i cant stand guns. i had my friend matt come over he wanted to meet my mom. i thought ok cool. he seemed nice and for the last two weeks he had been walking me home from work so i didnt have to be scared and alone walking through the woods at night.
anyways we ended up going to his houe to check out what movies he had. he brought out a gun. i am so afraid of guns. i hate guns. ever since my best friend died i cant stand to even see a gun. i totally flipped out on him. i didnt mean to. we came back to my house and sat here chillin out. the screen saver was on and mom has one of my pictures on it. well it popped up and he saw it he said, " who is that fat girl on the computer?" i knew i was fat he totally confirmed it for me. now i have to really have to start exercising everyday. i cant slack off. i have to get back to my old size. i just have to. i cant do this anymore. i ended up getting sick cause mom made me eat. he told me he thought i was bulimic. it wasnt a very good night. i was really upset. anyways that was my evening. after he left i just cried. i wanted to talk to someone but had no one to talk to. i still dont have anyone to talk to. oh well